Thursday, July 31, 2014


Bibi glanced at the clock one more time and wrinkled her nose in frustration. "Where is Tony for goodness sake?" He had sounded all concerned and agitated when she had spoken to him. He promised he would be with her as fast as possible.  

What could be keeping him?  She had dashed to the bathroom as soon as the call ended and got her self ready in 15 minutes. She did a quick mental check - presentable clothes- check!  teeth all brushed and clean - check! decent hair - no check! She almost forgot to remove her sleeping scarf. She yanked it off her head and dashed to the mirror to shake out her braids- now check! 

She kept expecting the knock on the door. She chewed her lower lip one more time, a sure sign she was getting worried, and tried dialing Tony's number. It rang out. She contemplated sending an sms, but decided against it. In any case, he never read his text messages on time.

She checked in on the kids, and they were fast asleep. Bless their hearts. If not for them, she would have gone insane.  And bless Tony too. He was everything she had ever wished for in a guy.

She walked back to her room, and her eye caught a picture peeking from one of the book shelves.  It was a picture of herself, Tonye and Tony. The three musketeers, they were called back in the day. Tonye was always the 'bad' guy, and Tony was the cool dude. Shame she fell hard for the bad guy - it would be this same 'badness' that would ruin their marriage.

She thought to herself "Why couldn't he just grow up and stop being reckless? Even if he was experiencing the famous mid life crisis, why didn't he just buy a motor bike like Yinka?

Wednesday, July 30, 2014

On Vacation

I am on vacation. For the first time in a long time, I do not have to wake up 5 am, hurriedly say prayers, wrestle the lil one off my back so he can also get ready for school, get dressed in the dark (so I don't have to wake the hubby up--- you see I am a very considerate and caring wife, hehehe), bundle ourselves into the car by 6:30 am, dash off to Ikeja GRA to drop him off at playschool, win another wrestling episode to get him out of the car and into his teacher's arms, turn around, beat the nasty traffic to get to work by 7:30am, grab a bottle on water as I dash up the stairs, take my medication, dart to the restroom, slap on the war paint makeup, straighten my clothes, swipe any baby drool, wear my shoes and then tastefully glide to my desk with my early morning smile, which some fearless soul tells me it is a cross between a grimace and a snarl.  PHEW! 

Thankfully, I have Esther, aka Estee-loo, our nanny from Ghana who has been with me since Adrian was 4 months, and of course, the super efficient Wale, the driver aka my first born son. 

It is a frequent joke among the two of them, Wale is my first born, Esther is my second child, and Adrian is the 3rd. Together, we are one big happy family. We operate in some loose form of democracy. Decisions are taken collectively, especially when it concerns the lil one. And then, each is given the freedom to execute at their own will during the week. It is quite unique, I tell you. 

Tuesday, July 29, 2014

Eid Mubarak friends.

Aunty Ehis, why do you say Happy Sallah? we are Christians?!" 

Whoa..... I was a bit thrown by that question yesterday. I never ever asked myself if I was crossing a spiritual line by extending warm greetings to someone of another faith. Same way I never thought if I was sinning if I was invited for iftar. 

I tried to find a biblical passage to help me understand what was the the right thing to do. I vaguely recall David being so hungry he ate consecrated shewbread, meant only for the priests. I also recalled Jesus and his disciples so faint with hunger that they harvested ears of corn and ate them directly, incurring the wrath of the Pharisees who accused them of harvesting and breaking the Sabbath. 

Funny how their thoughts were: we rather you die of hunger and keep the Sabbath today, than to eat and keep the Sabbath for more years!! 

Then I went to Corinthians where Paul advised us to be careful so our actions do not cause weaker brethren to sin, in the context of food sacrificed to idols. 

I am not the Bible expert nor scholar, so after the foray into the scriptures, I tried to imagine what Jesus would have done.

Would he have woken up in the morning and upon seeing people of another faith, wished them well?
Would he understand that they were fasting and try to be patient and caring during the period?
At work, would he agree for them to close early so they could rest especially during those 2 hours  before the fast is over? would he be careful not to plan unneeded late meetings during the period?. 
Would he send them a big fruit basket to use to break their fast? would he join them for iftar? 

Saturday, July 19, 2014


Tony didn’t see THAT coming!

As he stood in front of the door, his mind flashed back to the Sherlock Holmes movie where Sherlock and his arch nemesis Professor Moriarty played out all possible scenarios assuming they engaged in a fight. His mind started to race through scenarios:  

“What if Tonye punches me? I can return the punch, and then all hell will break loose. He looks like he has been working out, but I have the height advantage. Sadly, my polo shirt will suffer the damage, but Mama Azuka, my elderly neighbor can get me another one. 

Poor Mama Azuka, How would she feel if she saw me fighting? She probably would run out brandishing her walking stick, shouting Evi Ednah Ogholi’s hit song ‘Stop that fight, you may lose your life' ---- Mind, are you kidding me?”

Ok, what if Tonye punches me and I do not retaliate? Would he take that as a weakness and keep punching me?  How long would I stay calm before I start to punch him back? What if he pulls a gun and tries to shoot me? --- Seriously?"

But wait oh, what if he really tried to shoot me?  I would have to struggle for the gun, and it may just go off.  Honestly, I would just die in peace. But the bullet may hit Tonye instead. OMG. What if he dies?! How will I be able to look Bibi and the kids in the eye? How can I prove it was an accident and not premeditated murder? I would enter police wahala, I could even end up in jail! --- Calm down mind!”

Whichever scenario, Tony knew today was the day, where they would have to decide who gets Bibi. One person will win. And one person will lose.    

Tonye finally broke the painful silence: “Hi traitor, can I come in?”

Friday, July 11, 2014

RECISION - Redirection

He heard the phone ringing on the bedside table.   

It was her ringtone. He hesitated for a second, trying to decide whether to pick it up, or let it ring out.  He decided to risk it.  “Hey pumpkin, I am kinda busy right now… his voice trailed off as he grasped her faint words….…"What happened? Listen, its ok, everything will be fine. I am coming over now”

His mind raced in all directions as he replayed the extremely brief call – "Tonye knows”.

What does he know? How much does he know? How did he find out? But most importantly, what did it mean for them?

One thing was sure – he had to get out of the house FAST. He could see her in his mind’s eye – sitting on the bed, clutching the phone tightly, trying hard not to crack under the strain. He felt it in her voice – her usually musical voice had a tinge of sadness that just broke his heart.

"Tonye knows”

He didn't see that coming at all. He had just dropped her off at home, and they shared a lingering kiss, making their usual 'if-then' plans for the weekend. IF Tonye goes out, THEN we can have lunch on Sunday. At the back of his mind, he knew he was taking a risk, kissing her so close to her gate, but it was very dark, they were in the car, no one could see them. At least, so he thought. 

His thoughts froze for a second. Was Tonye watching them from the window? Was he the shadowy figure that appeared to be lurking around the neighbor’s house?  How did he get her to tell him?  Did he yell at her? Did he become violent? 

This Thing Called LIFE. Vanity. Upon. Vanity

Cynthia. Cynthia Amaize Cynthia Ovuede. Federal Government Girls College. 1989. We liked FGGC Benin because at least we could make ou...